darkflavor

Here is an old and odd piece of news I stumbled across from way back 090995 while searching for Reznor’s LA studio:

LOS ANGELES-UPI: Rock music sensation Trent Reznor, 34, was found by
LAPD officers in what they describe as “doing weird sex stuff with some
sorta midget or dwarf”. Reznor was found at a motel called the Frightened
Pig in South Central Los Angeles. The desk clerk heard strange, loud
noises coming from his room, but ignored them, saying “I heard weirder
stuff than that when old people come in”, but decided to call police when
said person of short stature ran naked up to him yelling ,”Faith and
begorrah! I need help! That guy in there is some sort of freak! He kidnapped
me at a club and made me do all sorts of weird stuff! Call the cops!” The
clerk, who only gave his name as Freddy, did just that. The police
arrived minutes later, where they learned the identity of the victim. One
Patrick O’Houlihan,37, a visitor from Ireland, who claims to be an elf, that
mythical creature of Irish legend. One of the arresting officers, Lt.
Abner Dwiller, 29, said of his claims,”Well, he sure is a short fella,
but as for being an elf? Well, that I don’t know, although my pappy said
there are still things left in this world to discover.” And maybe there
are, dear reader, although in my opinion this “elf” guy is just another
weirdo denizen of the sprawling metropolis I like to call Dinkieville,
but which most of you know as Los Angeles.
Police spokesperson Alannah Betsawna said that Reznor, a popular
crooner with the youngsters, would likely be charged with simple
confinement, and not the greater charge of kidnapping, which is a felony
offence.
Reznor, who was contacted by this reporter, had no comment.